Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Go ahead and tell me you'll leave again, you'll just come back running...

ps...that's a fucking amazing song

but anyway

I'm still trying to remember what it felt like to smile a real smile....
when id stay up all night talking to you
and then the next day id tell everyone about all the cute things you'd said
you were the first boy to make me feel beautiful in so long
and when you went away for the first time you took that feeling with you
again you left me feeling repulsive and ugly, i hate myself and i cant get past it

when you came back i thought you'd bring that feeling with you
but you havent
it feels different now
because im waiting for you to leave again
you always leave
and then you come back at your liesure
just when i think its ohkay to forget you

and now i cant forget you
and i wait up every night hoping you will text me
and some nights when ive waited long enough ill text you
and hope that you will reply

you keep telling me youve missed me
but you were the one that went away
and i am the stupid girl that lies awake crying every night because i cant forget you, and i cant forget the way it felt to feel beautiful

and i know im ridiculous for letting a stupid boy determine how i feel about myself....but when your self confidence is in negatives you will graps at anything to feel good about yourself

now only time will tell me when you will leave again....and another night will pass when ill believe all the stupid things you say...because my heart thinks you've missed me and my heart thinks you care....and soon enough my heart will find out the real truth.

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