Wednesday, April 28, 2010




its a tad cut off and i dont know how to make my blog bigger so here is the link....check check check it out :D

Tuesday, April 27, 2010


so lets just say im more than a little bit excited for youngbloods to be released. It would have to be my most awaited album of the year, and im even more excited for the tour.
Sarah and I are heading to both Melbourne shows and the show in Bendigo so its going to be ssiicckkk!



Saturday, April 24, 2010

id shed my skin if you were willing to see me...

im not quite sure what that means...

ill sing you a song you will never hear,
and ill whisper words that wont reach your ear,
i'll draw you a picture you will never see,
and ill map out the way to get to me.
I'll blow you kisses you will never feel,
and touch you in ways id wish were real,
id hold you all night till the sun came back,
and kiss your cheek as you took a nap.
Id be everything you wanted,
you are everything i need,
but you can never be here,
Because you'll never see me.

Friday, April 23, 2010

if you wanted a blog written about you, all you had to do was ask...

and i promised my self i wouldn't spend this weekend crying about you but just like every promise ever made to always gets broken

i know you will never read these words
and even if you did i know you wouldn't care

but i wish i could get the feeling back
the one you gave me.
you were the only person in the history of forever who made me feel beautiful and so quickly you took that feeling away...i hate you for doing that, i want that feeling back.

i want so badly for you to be back in my life
the way it was before
id stay up every night just to talk to you
and wake up in the morning just to read the cute things you'd left for me

you used to tell me i was beautiful and for the first time in forever i actually believed it, because i believed you...i believe everything you'd ever told me. how foolish i can be

now i sit here crying because i cant stop thinking about you.....i have waited so long for today and i knew it'd only bring disappointment but i never expected it'd feel like this...i didn't think you still meant that much to me....

food for my hungry thoughts...

I was just reading some posts on (if your are closed minded I wouldn’t bother reading)

but the stuff presented is actually rather interesting. The web bot predictor post is probably the one that got me thinking the most thus far..especially about the data gap from early 2012 to may 2013....made me think heaps!

Ill quickly summarise that psrt. However, no matter what your beliefs are i do urge you to check out this does provide a large amount of food for thought. A lot of what is presented doesnt match up with my beliefs but it is still always interesting to read about what other people believe and have found out.

The web bot is a technology that was discovered by Cliff High and George Ure. They claim it is able to predict future events by tracking keywords entered on the Internet. Originally it was created to predict stock market trends, but in 2001 they saw what they called a large "tipping point" that lasted for about six hours with a "release period" of about five days. The date was September 11th. From that moment on, they decided to dedicate their lives to improving the Web Bot's ability to predict the future. They say the Web Bot is correct a little more than 50 percent of the time.

Two future predictions for 2010 are:
-November 11th, 2010 - The web bot warns of a big tipping point possibly World War III
-December 14th, 2010 - The web bot predicts the first missile launch of World War III

There doesnt seem to be any catalyst for World War III, but im just posting things that fascinated me. The prediction that really drew my attention was the catastrophe set to begin early 2012 and end may 2013. Between this period of time there is a data gap. The belief of the write for this data gap is the next geomagnetic storm, the last was in 1859. If this is true then the entire world will be left without any electricity. That means no power to run lighting, tv, straighteners, computers, BASICALLY the majority of things we now rely on around the world.

read about it if you are even the slight bit is actually rather interesting. whether we choose to believe is a different story...

Thursday, April 22, 2010

you can crush me, so please dont crush me...

you are just two people filling eachother's void for human attention and affection. Dont trick yourself into believing it is much more that, its impossible for it to be.

You are just two kids who long to be loved and therefore you have created the illusion of it, and in the fear of it dwindling away you will fight so powerfully to keep that illisuion there. Oh how i hate the over use of 'i love you' these days. It used to mean something, now its thrown around by every love sick teeanger who has been in a relationship for a few days.

And i see the path you are taking, you have walked this path so many times before, the path just had a different face, this road a different name. And i know the way it will end, you throw yourself into these things too quickly. And how can you say ' i love you' and then go and do the other things you do....dont worry honey i want rat you out!

But when you are done playing magician maybe you can sink back to planet earth for a while.....

Monday, April 19, 2010

sarah and i

get ourselves into the most ridiculous situations and we choose to do rather random things. from a simple little game we have now created a challenge for ourselves.
im not saying what it is...but oh how fun it shall be

oh god the shit we come up with...

Sunday, April 18, 2010

and this week...

will show me the truth i have been waiting to see for a while now....

it will disappoint me in one of two ways
the feeling is inevitable...

i wish i could forget you
i really wish i'd stop trying!

Friday, April 16, 2010

i like my coffee black just like my metal...

So, my massive beef at the moment is something that is pretty important to me and it has to do with the condition of our local music scene in Melbourne and how ever so quickly we are losing it.

Being someone who organises gigs i can symapthize with the bands that are saying no one is coming out to their shows because i can assure you, it is true!

If you can say you love a band and you can buy, or probably download, their album/s and you can tell everyone how much you love them and you can post their lyrics in your bulletins and statuses etc...then why the fuck cant you get down to one of their shows...its as simple as that. Bands livelihoods revolve around playing shows and seeing their fans (because that is what you call yourselves) watching them. Most of these bands play shows that cost no more than 20 dollars, but you will find a lot of the gigs, especially if they are with FReeZA committees, are going to be free or pretty close to that anyway. So go and get ten bucks and go and see a local show. Not only is it a lot of fun but the bands and organisors love it :)

words of the past ring true in my future....

reading over my old posts remembering the way i used to feel and i realise i havent made much progress.
i still feel the same hurting i did before, the hurting has just taken on a new face.
there is one blog i wrote that i still completely relate to, and i liked it....have a read if you wish...

the future...

when i think about the future i get so scared
soon ill be finished school and ill have to find something else to do to fill my time.
im scared of growing up, of getting out into the world on my own, i dont want to have to make my own decisions.
oh gawsh the future is a scary place, and i dont want to go there just yet.
i guess we all get older, if we are living it is inevitable. it scares me that i look back and remember thinking "wow in 6 years ill be 18 and in year 12" it used to excite im a month from being 18 (and im still friggin excited haha) but being in year 12 is the scariest place ive ever been. holding my breath while waiting for sac marks hoping that i did okay.

but this bulletin really started because i dont want the next week to go weekend something is going to happen. if this happened three months ago i would have been overjoyed but now im hesitant...because i know whats going to happen. well, i guess there are two possibilites....and im really not even sure which possibility is better anymore.
it kills kill me....dont let next weekend come :/

Thursday, April 8, 2010

one day i will find this feeling....

“Love is the extremely difficult realization that something other than oneself is real.”


...i can assure you, you were never a friend of mine.

for so long its been about him, and before it was about him, there were other assholes just like him that took my heart and then tried to give it back before i was ready.

but a few days ago i realized there has been someone who has been there through it all...someone who my heart longed for but my mind tried to pretend it didn't want.
i think this is because out of every boy I've ever longed for this boy is the most unattainable.

lately when i see him i get butterflies.....not those big angry mean ones, but little cute ones right at the pit of my stomach.

i know he isn't the sort of boy that would look at me the way i look at him....but its fun to pretend that maybe he might.

realization is a bitch...because it forces you to accept those little things you have been trying to hide, the parts of your thoughts you fight to forget and pretend they never popped into existence.

...but now i long for the day when your arms will be around me and it'll mean more than friendship....

...i hope one day we can be more than friends...